Changing my mindset

Sometimes, we need to change the way we think because if we keep on doing and thinking the same way, how is anything supposed to ever change?

“Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” ‭‭[Romans‬ ‭8:37-39‬]:

In the past, I have allowed myself to get into a bitter mindset when it came to my infertility journey. I tried, I lost, I tried again, I lost another, I tried yet again, I lost yet again. You see the cycle was not becoming something I enjoyed enduring. I got the distant “I’m sorry’s” and the “Again?” and the best one, “You really shouldn’t try again”. And I would get that into my head and wonder, ‘should I really never try again?’ ‘Why do all these other people get more than one baby?’ However, that’s a dangerous place to be living in the land of why’s and what if’s and how come’s. That land is no mans land and sometimes its hard to return from that destination.

And as horrid of a place that was to be, I kept finding myself creeping there in the depths of my heart after each loss. Each time, I pulled myself out because I didn’t want to be there feeling that way. I like being optimistic and life full of rainbows and happiness but I admit there have been times, when the rainbows felt like they were never coming and the happiness was just a façade for the world.

Once I returned from that ugly trip for good, I decided enough was enough and I would give myself time to sort out my feelings. I would be happy when someone was pregnant and expecting and I would truly get excited to share in their successes and joys and not ever return to that fretful place in my heart ever again. Because hope is a magical thing that leads us to the land of rainbows and glass half full kind of outlook on life. Hope gives us back what was taken away when we were in despair.

So because our hope is set on what is yet to be seen, we patiently keep on waiting for its fulfilment. Rom 8:25   Richard Rohr writes, “IF YOU ARE NOT trained in how to hold anxiety, how to live with ambiguity, how to entrust and wait—you will run—or more likely you will “explain.” Not necessarily a true explanation, but any explanation is better than scary liminal space. Anything to flee from this terrible “cloud of unknowing.”  CLICK THE IMAGE TO KEEP READING:

With true joy, my heart began to heal from all the things I had been through. I returned home and went on an amazing vacation to my favorite happy place, Disney World, which always just puts me in a good mood. I came back from that trip with a renewed sense of hope and faith in my Creator. It is far too easy to book a one way ticket to No Mans Land and have bitterness and ugly build up in your heart. I made a conscious effort to never go there again.

I started searching for verses and talking to the Lord each morning and the more I talk to Him, the more I talked and listened, the more I heard. Something changed in my heart and I started not only just talking with Him, but I found myself having meaningful prayers with God like never before. Its vulnerable telling others about things that trouble us but I felt a sense of need to share my stories with the world in this way. I have been a believer since I was a little girl, baptized since I was a teenager and have always tried hard to study and learn as much as I can, but for the first time in my life, I feel a yearning and a sense of peace talking with God and I am glad I found this place of contentment.

During one of my studies, I have been reading and writing out Romans 8. There are so many treasures tucked inside these verses that I have read before yet never truly “heard”.

This week, if you have a difficult conversation coming up, ask the Holy Spirit to fill you with his power. If you have a lot to do or if there's something that makes you anxious or stressed, pray, "Holy Spirit, fill me with your power." #UnstoppableGod: See the Bible tells us that we are not set aside. God is with us all the time. He has not forgotten or will never forget us, especially when we are in need. But this verse, Romans 8:26, goes a step further to tell us that not only is God never going to leave me or you but the holy Spirit PLEADS for us and PRAYS for us when we don’t know what to pray. I always would sit back and look at others when they were praying and say, “Wow, Lord,  THEY SURE KNOW HOW TO PRAY”. But all the while, when I couldn’t the right words, The Holy Spirit was finding the words for me and praying them for me in a way that words cannot express.

I will take it even one step further… a few verses down in this same chapter…. it tells us that Not only is God for us, not only is the Holy Spirit pleading for us, but Christ sitting at Gods right hand is praying for us as well. Jesus Christ is taking the time to PRAY FOR YOU and for ME. Take a moment and think about that.

Romans 8:28 God works all things for good:

God has not forgotten me. God has set me apart for a reason. Gods reasoning is far better than my own. And Romans 8:28 tells us that we should KNOW that ALL THINGS God works for the good of those who love Him. You see, I may have lost babies and pregnancies but all the while, God is working something magical and It is not my time yet.

Maybe its your time right now. Maybe its your best friends time. Maybe just maybe my time is coming very soon, but I know that no matter when or if it may come, God has a plan and a purpose for me and for your life that we cannot see right now.

As I write this morning, Hurricane Matthew is approaching the Bahamas. He is a big one. But my God is bigger. Matthew is strong, yet my God is stronger. Matthew is unpredictable yet my God knows all. I pray for the families that have lost their loved ones in this massive storm. I pray for the islands and the land and the earth that Matthew will affect over the next few days. I pray he continues to weaken and to pick up speed and go out to sea where he would not be a bother to any lives. In all this we pray, in Jesus name, Amen.

Scripture memorization:

Peace be with you. Peace be with my Bahamaland as we get hit with this storm. And as I travel the uncharted waters of my infertility journey, I pray that these verses will comfort you in whatever deep waters you are facing in  your life too.

 

 

 

 

 

Meal Planning 21 Day Fix Style

Monday, Here I come!

I am starting a challenge with my beachbody coach on Monday. For the past six weeks, I can honestly say I have been mindfully trying to eat clean and exercise. I am ten lbs down and countless inches! (Over 15!!!) I love challenges because they give you something to focus on. Each Thursday, a few friends of mines meet at  my house for a weigh in meeting and we are all doing different programs and seeing different results.

i can and i will / quote:

It comes a moment when you just are feeling so great that you do not want the things you used to crave. I actually do not “CRAVE” anything anymore. I am never hungry and yet never stuff myself full.

Today was planning day. It has to  be one day of the week that we spend to plan our week upcoming and grocery shop and what not.

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First I pulled out my trusty grocery list and made a list from my recipe books and what was already in my pantry. I cannot tell you how IMPORTANT THIS IS! I have been so many times and ended up buying something (or not buying something) because I thought I had it or not.

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Here is what my 21 day fix splurge at the store looks like!

I have my fresh fruit and veggies, Feta Cheese, Egg whites, Oats, Whole wheat crackers, pumpkin spice (YAY), Chobani Greek Yogurts, and Brown Rice to spice up.

The New items I am trying is the Village Harvest Quinoa and the Enjoy Life Pizza Crust made with Ancient Grains. I will post next week after we use them.

Happy “Fixing” !!!!!

 

Waiting…

Waiting; described in Merriam Webster dictionary as

  •  to stay in a place until an expected event happens, until someone arrives, until it is your turn to do something, etc.
  •  to not do something until something else happens

  •  to remain in a state in which you expect or hope that something will happen soon

 

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James 5:7 tells us, “Therefore be patient, brethren, until the coming of the Lord. See how the farmer waits for the precious fruit of the earth, waiting patiently for it until it receives the early and latter rain”.

Is it just me or does everyone find it hard in the time of waiting?

I really love how one of the definitions was to not do something while we wait for something to happen. When I think of not doing something, I think of being still and perfectly at peace doing nothing, not a lazy type of nothing just a serene type of nothing. But it also is difficult to just sit around all full of peace and serenity while we want things to be happening. Right?

Then we think of what James writes in the Bible, ‘waiting patiently for it until it receives the early and latter rain’. We are to think like a farmer waiting for the precious fruit that he has worked over. My Dad is a farmer and I watch him with grace tend to his trees as if they are his children with patience and love. I think it is why he grows so many different amazing things. His trees never for an instant doubt that he is going to water them or not prune them when they get too bushy.

Jesus is said to be our gardener and our farmer. Sometimes we are in the grove of our lives just waiting to be watered and pruned as the weeds grow up around us. However, if we do not practice patience, we may wither just as the tree would if not tended to properly.

Sometimes in these seasons of waiting, we look around and we let envy creep into our hearts and we need to weed that out right away or it can choke us like a weed chokes a vine in the garden. Envy can fester inside our hearts and just look ugly.

I don’t know about you, but I know I do not want an ugly heart filled with envy and weeds growing up around me choking the joy and life out of my body.

There has been much on my heart lately in this time of wait. I have to embrace this time and spend more time with God watering me with his words and filling me with his presence so that the time passes without worry and envy.

There is a time for everything and God is good ALL THE TIME.

Are you in a time of waiting as well?

Are you looking at others lives and thinking, Why not me? or Why me? Let us weed our hearts today to make sure that we are truly living a life of joy and peace in our time of wait.

God already has a plan for you and for me and it is in these moments, he wants us to turn to Him and to rest in the assured faith that He is with us.

One of my favorite verses in the Bible says,

“To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under heaven

Ecclesiastes 3:1

This may be my season of waiting.

I embrace it and give it all to God.

Thrown into the Rabbit Hole…

The gallery for --> Alice In Wonderland Disney Falling Down The Rabbit Hole:

Down, down, down.

I cannot even believe how long it has been since I have sat here and typed, and how easy it is to stray away from the things we love the most for the sake of busyness.

The world is odd in that way. The busier our lives seem to get, the more stressed we feel, the more unhealthy we get, and then one day we wake up feeling like we have been thrown down the rabbit hole without a guide.

Strange comparison, I know, however, that’s exactly how I felt. Last September, My son and I started homeschooling again. Come November, I was offered a plea to go back to teaching full time because the school had lost their third grade teacher. If you know me, you would know its very hard to say no (although I am working on this) and I pondered and pondered over this decision for weeks until we finally just said, “YES”. In January, I had to bring 18 really wonderful students back up from where their previous teacher had led them astray academically and emotionally. Don’t get me wrong, I loved this challenge, but by June, I was faced with the same decision as the previous year. Should I stay? or Should I go? I didn’t know whether it was because I had been given the extra chance to try it out or just because my heart is in homeschooling despite the opinion of just near everyone I know. I bit the bullet and wrote my resignation letter, again.

It was not easy as I do not like disappointing people but in the end if I had taken on another year, I would have only been disappointing the children because my heart was not there and that’s not fair. One day, I know I will return to teaching in a school setting but for now, there are many adventures that await.

These adventures have already begun as I have the time to sit and write again, time for afternoon tea, a tradition that I truly love, and time for my health which is by far the most important.

We just came back from an amazing Disney trip and I have to say it was the best yet.

My little guy will be turning 8, yes you read that right, EIGHT years old in five days! Where has the time gone? He is bubbly and creative and imaginative and filled with laughter and jokes and apparently he and his uncle are a part of the “Jocker’s Club” which makes me smile for days thinking about the time they got to spend together. It was way overdue.

I feel like me again.

I feel like I am no longer falling down through the rabbit hole, but have now reached the point where I am about to open the door with hidden surprises behind it.

“No, no! The adventures first, explanations take such a dreadful time.”  ― Lewis Carroll, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland & Through the Looking-Glass:

The adventures that lie behind the door are a mystery but I have never been more excited for what God has in store for our lives. It is never a dull moment and I love that I will have the time to explore these adventures to their fullest potential.

In a few weeks, we start THIRD GRADE together we couldn’t be more thrilled.

Renewed Passion

After a very long break from taking photos, I have renewed my passion for a long lasting hobby of mines. I had the opportunity to take some photos of a very good friend this past week. I love natural light photography sessions and this was no exception; The light was perfect for photos and thanks to my lovely assistant who manned the reflector, we got some awesome shots.

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Beautiful Alanna

Considering we were in Abaco, I felt like these images transported us to an Irish garden or something! They were so much fun to edit because they needed hardly no editing.

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And then after the garden scene, we headed over to find some beautiful waves for the background.

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And finally after we found some awesome spots, we went on a search for some outdoor flowers.

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Blessings,

Amy

Time to hit the books…

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The magic of new beginnings is a time when we say goodbye to something and say hello to a different something.

In June, I finished my very first year of teaching in a large setting out of the house. As much as my heart loved the children, the people and the experiences, my heart felt as if it were missing something important. There was a puzzle piece missing from my life and I knew when I decided to homeschool again, that homeschooling would be my missing piece. Over the past ten weeks of Summer, I have dedicated my life to getting healthier and growing closer to my family and to God.

I happily feel more like myself and feel more confident to start a new beginning. I have lost weight and gained a greater sense of self while walking the journey God intended for me. From the moment I had our son, I knew I wanted to be a major part of his life. I knew I wanted to spend time with him and frankly a few hours at the end of the day is just not enough. These years go by so quickly, and this time I get with him and time I get to be home with my family being the home-maker are far too precious to let slip away.

This journey that God has led me to may not be for everyone. But it is my journey and my family’s journey to walk alongside the Lord we serve and love.

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This is one of my all time favorite reasons for homeschooling. God gave  us his commands that we should teach our children when we walk our journey each day, when we lie down and when we rise up. So I am rising up into this role that God has led my heart to have passion for and serve him throughout the ministry of being a devoted wife to my husband helping with my fair share of the house duties and being a caring and loving mommy to our son teaching him how to be a responsible and loving adult one day.

Tomorrow we get to start our adventure through Sonlights Core B&C as we head through the history of the world and soar through the pages of classic literature and take nature walks. The possibilities are endless because we can do whatever we set our mind to accomplish each day.

I cannot believe our son is starting Second Grade and God has blessed this family with what we need to enrich all of our lives and hearts as we grow closer and steer the boat of our life on the path straight to God.

Many blessings to each of you,

Amy

Golden Opportunities

I just cannot believe it has been over three months since I last sat and wrote here on my global journal. Ha! The past few months have been filled with many moments; some great, some not so great and some smack dab in the middle.

I have been on a prayer journey, trying to find a closeness with the Lord and cultivating it daily not only on an individual level but in our marriage as well. I have included my students in my prayer journey and we pray often in class now, out loud for the Lord to hear our voices.

This past month has been chocked full of new events. My new church family has embraced and welcomed me with open arms and I feel a peace about that move. I even have enjoyed the fabulous company of my husband at church, which is a welcomed surprise. I just know its due to focusing our marriage and our life on Christ even more so than ever before.

I attended my very first Easter sunrise service at 6:30a.m. on Easter morning to celebrate Christ rising from the grave and to remember the grace that he so graciously showed us. I recently read that we should always remember GRACE as:

GODS
RICHES
AT
CHRISTS
EXPENSE

I really loved that acronym for such a powerful message. Simple, yet effective.

I also attended my very first Ladies Conference and met one of the most amazing women ever. The speakers testimony touched my heart and her thoughts throughout the conference have dug deep into my soul.

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This was our verse for the weekend. I even taught it to my nineteen first graders because I loved it so much. Every time I have started to say something, this verse pops into my head and I ask myself, Is this something I need to say? Maybe I should just listen. Maybe I should just wait right now.

The speakers husband has been preaching at the church throughout their time here as well. I have thoroughly enjoyed his sermons. But my favorite moment was when he spoke of golden opportunities. These moments in our lives that are intertwined with Gods plan and when they pass, sometimes they may never come again.

We recently made a decision to go back to homeschooling next year. I don’t doubt that I love teaching and love being able to touch the lives of children in the classroom setting. However, I have one little life whom God has blessed me with and the time spent with him is more precious than anything. It is making a sacrifice and knowing that this is my golden opportunity. I can always go back to teaching in a bigger setting in the future, but I will only have these years when my baby is young, once. They will not come around again. I have to reach out and grab this opportunity, this moment while I have the chance. Otherwise, just as the wind passes by, time will fly and this too will just be a fleeting memory.

When the speaker said this, it grabbed deep into my heart and tugged on the deepest part of my soul. I knew in that moment God was telling me, “Daughter, my child, You are taking your golden opportunity and I am proud of you.”

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These are the moments when my family will be cultivating roots for the day when we let him spread his wings and fly. Wyatt and I have had the best experience going out to school this year, and I having the blessing of teaching him in a school setting as well, but I could not be more thrilled to be coming back home this Fall, and diving into the literature that we have awaiting us. I even want to do a little home project to build a library into my spare bedroom because we have so many books and have such a love of books that I think it shall be our summer project.

I have loved every moment of getting to know my new friends, and I look forward to corresponding and keeping in touch with them and hearing about their lives and praying for these two awesome and amazing children of God. I find it so amazing when the Lord brings people into our lives at the exact opportune moment when we need them the most.

Praise be the Lord,

Blessings,

Amy

Restoring Health

Matthew 11:28 ~ Come to Me all who are weary & I will give you rest.

What a comforting message from God.

Its two weeks into the New Year and the Lord is definitely helping me with my get healthy journey. Working amongst little ones all day is very rewarding but sometimes can get tiring as our bodies grow weary.

I have to remind myself of this verse especially when all those germs start cheering because they think

they have knocked me down. This past weekend, I started feeling that tingle in my throat. I started getting more vitamin C, drinking lots of fluids, resting, but by Monday, I had absolutely no voice. There were no subs available and I didn’t want to put a strain on anyone at work so I went in yesterday only to come home late afternoon completely congested like a plugged up drain. However, did I give up ?????

No way, I did some light exercises and stretching which made me feel on top of the world… got a steamy warm shower and coated in vicks rub (that stuff seriously is amazing) and snuggled in my cozies and graded papers! Every few moments, I would say a prayer for the Lord to heal me and help me wake up not feeling as I did last night.

When my eyes opened this morning, they did so ever so slowly almost partly in fear that I would be dizzy or couldn’t speak and to my surprise, I feel OKAY! and hey I will take it! I got up slowly, and made me a hot cup of Green Tea filled with antioxidants and Honey and I feel OKAY! Praise the Lord.

Jeremiah 30:17 ...This also pertains to emotional healing !!!!!   CB

All the comfort in the world is found right in Gods amazing book. He has comfort and peace for us in all situations of our lives nestled between these pages if we only open it to find them. Sometimes I know the weather and the seasons give us germs and sometimes I feel like the DEvil wants to knock us when we are down but I will not let them win. I am taking control with Jesus at the wheel this year and I want to not only read his word but dive into it and study it!

Can I get an amen?

Now how is this for amazing?

Bible Verses for Hard Times | Christian Wallpapers: God's Pharmacy Natural Healing Remedies

God is the ultimate Physician!🙂 and His pharmacy does look wonderful!

Have a blessed Day!

Being Brave…

Because the World can Get Dark & We Really Need You ; 5 Ways to Keep Being Brave

Yesterday, I introduced the Word of the Week to my First Grade students. I want to focus on Character Traits because I have noticed their little minds have already begun being tested by this world and all the technology and things out there to bring children down. My goal is not only to teach them reading, writing, and arithmetic but to give them a taste of the world through history, understand how things work through science, find their inner imagination through books and to treat other people in this world with respect and dignity that each of us deserve.

Their first word for the year is:

Brave

A lot of them did not know what this word means … one child even said, “It’s a movie”.

Why Yes it may be a movie and I love the bravery that is shown in that Disney Flick but the bravery I am talking about is a little different than a movie.

It is the bravery that fills our souls with courage for another day.

Courage does not always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying I will try again tomorrow.

Its the bravery to be yourself regardless who likes it or not.

Ah . . . NLD, ADHD, Asperger's, Depression, Anxiety, PTSD, . . . YES, It's Okay to be Different!

Because I am trying to show them that people are different all over the world and there will be people who are afraid of different and that means sometimes they may be insecure and try to bully you down to become just like them.

Stand tall and be who you are!

God didn’t put us on this world to be imitating soldiers of one another. He put us here to let our gifts shine and soar all towards him not for the glory of each other.

In order to have courage, I feel its vital to have peace within our hearts, minds and souls.

Peace Experience all that there is for you, and discover who you truly are, in the present moment. BWE will help you follow your dreams and transform them into reality. Precise frequency patterns are introduced, activating the brainwave you require for the experience you wish to explore. Visit Waverider @ http://www.waveridermp3.com  and begin a new story.  Be all that you were meant to be.

Here are some awesome Scripture verses to bring you peace if there is something you are battling …

When I sat down with my Bible, devotional book, and journal yesterday morning I was empty. If anyone wanted to escape from “life” at that moment, it was me. But as I began to dwell on God’s truths, everything began to change. I was reminded that Jesus never intended for me to carry my burdens alone.

So I hope today as you read these verses it brings you a calming peace that it brought to me…

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I look forward to seeing my students this year blossom into their own little people, unique

with their differences.

Have a Blessed Day,

My Word Journalling- HEALTHY

It has been a long while since I have felt like my brain and my body were working on the same level towards the same goal. I was doing so well and then life got in the way so this year I want to try and journal throughout this entire year on my blog and in my fitness journal by hand to make sure I am taking care of my mind and pray to the Lord more often to let God take charge of this journey and not just myself.

My Word for this year: IMG_7529wee

I did one mile yesterday and two today!!! It felt OH SO GOOD to be nourishing my body and I remembered how much I just ADORE exercising… the rush and adrenaline … its a natural high.

heres to a great year accomplishing my goals….